Pregnant with silence

Slience is pregnant with possibility, but silence seems to be so rare. I spend a lot of time waiting for silence, like settling dust it does come along given a calm space, and then the magic happens. Trouble is, everyone likes a bit of silence and if you got some, hey someone seems to come along to trample up some dust.

Or is it that, the pregnancy of this silence is scary, what might be born from it? Better to trample through the silence and leave things as they are. I seem to attract many people who aren't interested in conversation, rather in monologues of things they're interested in. I offer silence, and perhaps my own fear of the pregnancy this offers spreads and quickly the silence is filled - with complete shit. I'm left splattered, feeling drained, and in need of a long quiet cleansing session to restore myself.

Or I'm not at all scared of the silence, but others are and this is contagious. And I'm here to do some work on this for others. Who knows. Emotion seems like water, it just flows, cascades, sometimes gets stuck in a stagnant pool, but most of all it's not part of any place in particular, it just is and moves about like a spirit fighting or dancing or just sleeping. Maybe depression is that stagnant pool, and people come along to splash it about and move it along, but even the pool evaporates eventually on it's own, the water moves along.

There will never be enough space. Or will there? Who said that? I go through phases of dispair when I'm basically thinking the thoughts of others, filling that silence with a tape-recording of some shit I've heard. And other times when I'm at peace when I know there is nothing to worry about because it's all in order. A hope that patience will bear fruit. Or a sense that everything is ok, that nothing needs fixing. Because nothing needs fixing. It's all good, as they say in Australia.